I’m taking a break from NaNoWriMo today, internet. I need a break from creative writing to do some uncreative writing.
You know what’s funny? Over the past little while since I’ve been, y’know, not posting regular updates, I’ve thought of so many things I wanted to tell you guys.
Like how much wine snobs annoy me. My parents and I went out for dinner and my dad asked the sommelier to pick us a white wine that would pair well with duck and steak, and the sommelier went (I’m not joking):
“Well, you should stay away from Napa Valley, but Soma or Bordeaux would be fine. I wouldn’t consider Germany at all, they just wouldn’t stand up.”
What? We’re drinking a wine, not moving. I figured he’d just pick between a chardonnay or a grigio, not a region.
Oh, and last week for yoga Tuesday I wanted to talk about whether or not yoga was too highly marketed towards women.
Oh, and also for work, I’ve hard to call a whole bunch of hotels, and a startling number of desk clerks had no idea what the address of their hotel was.
Oh, mi Madre left for Africa today. Did I mention she was going to Africa?
Also, I’ve started putting my Christmas list together, and I’m so old. Who puts loafers on their Christmas list? 9o year olds?
Also, I would very much like an electric ukulele, family. Please conspire.
(This is a test to see how many of my family members actually read my blog.)
(Hint – they don’t, mostly.)
Oh, also, I think I’m going to sign up for my very first credit card, internet. Any suggestions as to which one I should pick?
I MISSED YOU GUYS.
I’ve been hanging on to these pictures hoping I would get the chance to use them in a post, but I can’t figure out where to fit them in.
They are quite good, however, so I figured I’d share:
This deer that doesn’t think I can see him.
This magnificent cloud.
This picture of my cat and my dog.
This dude lurking on the end of the bed.
This painting from a Chinese restaurant.
This magical floating toilet paper roll.
My poor blind dog.
I have a lot of irrational fears. They range the gamut from being a mild annoyance in my life to a crippling terror. One of my New Year’s resolution’s this year was to finally take one off the list. It’s not going well.
I think it’s interesting that fear can shift and change a lot over the course of someone’s life. When I was a little girl, I was pretty positive that at one point I was going to wake up and my bed with have floated out of the house because of a giant flood, so I slept with a bag of “survival supplies” (books, a change of underwear, and a chocolate bar). I do not have any idea where this concept came from, although I did live on a lake in Canada in a haunted house. My best guess is that the story of Noah’s Flood confused me. I was not a quick learner.
At some point my fear of flooding magically went away and was replaced with a ridiculous, all-consuming fear of heights. I fell off a chairlift and ended up dangling off of it for the whole ride up. It was unpleasant. I was maybe 10 years old. I still have a vivid memory of this incident. No bueno. Interestingly, I’ve becoming pretty good at handling chairlifts, but gondolas, tall cliff faces, large buildings, balconies, and poorly made porches are a serious no-go for me. I passed out at the top of the Eiffel tower. It was super embarrassing.
Coupled with my fear of heights is a fear I’can really only conceptualized as “fear-of-imagining-myself-falling-from-the-ceiling”. It’s almost like reverse claustrophobia in that I’m not great with large open spaces, but it’s more like I’m timid around large open spaces within buildings. I remember going into a very large cathedral in France and the space between myself and the roof was mindbogglingly awful. I was perfectly aware that I was on the ground and I wouldn’t even be going up somewhere high, but all that space above me was just the worst thing, for some reason.
Thunderstorms. I hate thunderstorms. I don’t like loud, sudden noises. I don’t know.
Do you have any awful irrational fears, internet?