Things that aren’t things that should be things.


My friend (whom I shall refer to as Varenka) and I talk about this a lot. I think a lot of people talk about concepts like this a lot, without knowing that they are doing it. It’s really more accurately “which of our inside jokes should everyone else be using”, but I like to think that this concept runs deeper then that. You know how every language has words that other languages don’t have describing feeling that everyone can relate with? For example, “pochemuchka”, which is the Russian word for “someone who asks too many questions”. This list is our list of feelings and things everyone relates with, but there aren’t words for them.

ABA – Absence of Bathroom Anxiety. When you either know you’ll be leaving a place with a bathroom or you’re about to enter a situation where you can’t leave to use a bathroom, and that thought makes you need to pee. Also applies when someone else’s need to pee makes you need to pee.

Interaction Inability – Everyone has those days when they really don’t want to talk to people, and there really isn’t a compelling reason not to, but the mere though of talking to anyone just sends you into a whirling chaos of annoyance and irritation. Those are the days you just want to hole up in your room with Netflix and spiked hot cocoa.

Pants-Worthy – Varenka and I are both yoga instructors, and thus we both spend about 95% of our week in leggings. It takes a sincere effort to get either one of us to put pants on. Or a bra. Or regular clothing of any kind. This is especially usable when you are chilling at home in your sweats and someone calls you out to the bar and you have to actually put clothing on to go out. Maybe you’ll make it out, but damn, it had better be a pants-worthy experience.

Food Need – Food-need happens when you have a particular craving for a certain food that you have absolutely no way of satisfying. Like if you get a craving for a certain sandwich you had in a café that’s now closed down or on a different hemisphere. You know. It’s happening to you right now, isn’t it?

3 comments

  1. Pingback: The WORSER worst date I’ve ever been on. « her name was cassandra
  2. Pingback: The Mental Breakdown- Scarlett O’Hara’s birthday part 2. | her name was cassandra
  3. Pingback: 3 more things that aren’t things that should be things. | her name was cassandra

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